French's International Copyrighted (in England, her Colonies, and 
the United States) Edition of the Works of the Best Authors 



No. 346. 




A ©ome&u in Sttprrr Arte 


BY 


ELIZABETH GALE 


Copyright, 1917. By SAMUEL FRENCH 


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The Romance Hunters 



A Comedy in lEtyvt* Atta 



BY 



ELIZABETH GALE 



Copyright, 1917, By SAMUEL FRENCH 



Amateurs may produce this play without payment of royalty. 
All other rights reserved. 



New York 
SAMUEL FRENCH 

PUBLISHER 

28-30 WEST 38th STREET 



London 
SAMUEL FRENCH. Ltd. 
26 Southampton Street 

STRAND 






-n 



& 



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©C!,D 46508 

, MAR 29 1917 
TMP92-009306 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 



CHARACTERS. 

Amanda Armen Who has social ambitions 

Margaret Berry Her niece 

Susan Williams Margaret's friend 

Nancy Reed. Another old schoolmate, romantically 

inclined 

Kezia Vreeland Who " likes to be on hand " 

Mrs. Berdan Who always is on hand 

Liza Steubbin The village gossip 

Cindy Brown Amanda's colored maid 

Enoch Westervelt.J/Tw hopes to marry Amanda 
Jim Harrison. . . .Who hopes to marry Margaret 

Howard Vanter Who also hopes to marry 

Margaret 

Hen Bush Who hopes to marry Nancy 

Clem Wicks. . Who suffers from a sense of humor 
Rufus Green Cindy's beau 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 



SYNOPSIS. 

Amanda Armen, a romantic, novel-reading 
spinster, plans to give her niece, Margaret, what she 
herself has always wished for and never had — the 
chance to marry a lord. They are about to start on 
a trip to Europe in quest of lords and ladies when 
Howard Vanter, who wishes to marry Margaret 
himself, induces Clem Wicks to pose as his cousin, 
Sir Clement Blackwell, in the hope of winning 
Amanda's favor because of this noble connection. 
Amanda, glad to enjoy home and " high society " at 
the same time, gives up all thought of the European 
trip and begins at once a lively round of entertain- 
ments in honor of the supposed lord. 

In the meantime someone has stolen Enoch 
Westervelt's money and suspicion rests upon Jim 
Harrison, Margaret's lover, who is away on busi- 
ness. But finally Jim returns, the real culprit is dis- 
covered, Clem, ashamed of the part he has played, 
confesses that he is plain Mr. Wicks and the ro- 
mance hunt ends, like most good things, at home. 



The Romance Hunters 



Scene : — Amanda Armen's garden. A strawberry 
festival is in progress and off to the left, out 
of sight behind the shrubbery, the people who 
have already come can be heard laughing and 
talking as they gather about the table. Well 
forward on the left Amanda sits on a rustic 
bench before a small table on which is a money- 
box and a pile of tickets. Just now, while there 
is a lull in the ticket selling, she is intensely 
interested in a paper-covered novel. She is 
dressed in the latest style with a few more 
ruffles and bows than she needs but her hair is 
drawn back tightly and twisted into a snug, 
neat little knot on the top of her head. 

Voice. (From behind the shrubbery) Jimminy 
spruce ! Where are those berries ! 

Another voice. There a'comin'. There 
a'comin'. 

First voice. So is day after to-morrow. 
(Laughter) 

Amanda. (Excited over her book and oblivious 
to her surroundings) My land o' Goshen ! She'll 
never get out of this fix ! 

(Enter Cindy from left. She has a very airy 
manner and wears a brilliant red dress, white 
cap and apron very stiffly starched but very 
much awry.) 

5 



6 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Cindy. Rufus ! Rufus Green ! Yo' good fo' 
nothin' black trash ! Where yo' all hidin' to ? 

{Enter Rufus from right. He is a very stout darky 
and is dressed for the occasion in clean blue 
overalls and a short white coat. On his arm 
he carries a basket, and in his hand a big strazv 
hat which he uses for a fan.) 

Rufus. {Coming in) I'se yhere. I'se yhere, 
Cindy. Now don' git flusterated. 

Cindy. {Severely) Flusterated! Yo' all'd 
flusterate and flabbergastify anybody I ever heard 
about. {Starting toward him with a threatening 
gesture) Now yo' git along dere wid dem berries. 
How long yo' reckon folks is goin' to wait? (Dis- 
pairingly as Rufus starts slowly to the left) Sakes 
to gracious ! Yo' walk like your feet was bashful, 
yo' do. {Following him up with vigorous gestures) 
Shoo ! Git along wid yo' ! 

Rufus. {Stopping, pleadingly) Now, Cindy, 
don' git raspy. I'se willin' if I ain't quick. 

Cindy. Well de folks is willin' an' dey'll be quick 
too, to eat dem berries yo' got. {Snapping her 
fingers) Now yo' step in dere right lively. 

Rufus. {Shambling off) Yas'm, I'se gwine to, 
I'se gwine, Cindy. (Exit Rufus at left) 

Cindy. (Clasping her hands in dismay) Sech 
a tangle foot ! An' he's de only beau I got ! 

Amanda. (Looking up from her book) Oh, 
Cindy. 

Cindy. (Coming down quickly) Say, how far 
did yo' git? (Pointing to the book) Am she mar- 
ried yet? 

Amanda. (Patting the book affectionately) Oh, 
no. They are having a terrible time. Somebody's 
locked up i-n the tower room, but I can't find out 
who. 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 7 

Cindy. {Trying to get the book) My land o' 
cotton ! Just lemme read one page ! 

Amanda. (Putting the book on the bench be- 
side her) Not until your work is finished. (Enter 
Margaret from down right. She is an attractive 
young girl and wears a simple but pretty light 
summer frock) Sakes' alive, child! Whatever 
made you so late? 

Margaret. (Coming over to the table) Oh, 
Auntie, I have been talking to Liza Stuebbin. She 
called and— — 

Amanda. Ain't she comin' to the strawberry 
festival ? (Cindy steals up behind Amanda, reaches 
over and gets the book and reads zvith wild but 
silent symptoms of delight) 

Margaret. Oh, yes, she is coming, but she will 
be late because she is going to the store first. (Sits 
in chair beside the table) And it took her all this 
time to tell me about it. 

Amanda. Yes, yes, Liza is a great talker, and 
you just bein' home from college and all I suppose 
she had a lot to say. 

(Enter Nancy and Susan from down right. 
Nancy is a gay little thing, very fussily 
dressed, but Susan is the strong, practical type 
of country girl and wears plain but becoming 
clothes.) 

Susan. Good-afternoon! 

Nancy. Hello, people ! 

Amanda. How d'y do, girls. 

Margaret. (Rising and going to meet them) 
Hello ! 

Nancy. (Running forward waving a paper- 
covered novel) I have finished it! Oh, Miss 
Armen, it was great ! Lady Wixion's Revenge — 
have you read it, Margaret? 



8 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Margaret. (Laughing) No, I haven't had 
time. (Going to her) I am so glad to see you, 
Susan ! 

Susan. (Giving her a hearty embrace) I am 
certainly glad to see you. And now I hope you 
will stay with us for a while. 

(Exit Cindy at rear, reading greedily.) 

Amanda. She is going to stay with me at any 
rate, but I guess she will have to leave the rest of 
you. 

Margaret. 

(Eagerly crozvding about 

Susan. \ Amanda) Why, what do 

you mean? 

Nancy. 

Amanda. I mean that it is time to carry out 
the plans I made ten years ago when Margaret came 
to live with me. I made up my mind then that she 
was goin' to have all the education she needed, and 
then she was goin' to have some romance in her 
life. Romance, says I, is the icin' to the cake and 
I never could abide a cake without icin'. I never 
had any romance myself, except in novels, but I 
am goin' to see Margaret have some, so just as soon 
as we can get things fixed we are goin' to start for 
Europe. 

Margaret. ] 

Susan. \ Europe ! 

Nancy. J 

Susan. What in the world are you going to 
Europe for? (She sits in chair beside the table) 

Amanda. For romance, I tell you. I 

Margaret. But, Auntie, you need not take such 
a long journey just for that. I have found all of 
the romance 1 want right here. (She is standing 
behind the table) 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 9 

Amanda. Hey? What? 

Margaret. I am going to marry Jim. 

Amanda. ] 

Susan. \ Jim Harrison? 

Nancy. 

Margaret. Yes, Jim Harrison. But please 
don't say anything about it yet, because you see, I 
am not really engaged to him. 

Susan ) 

Nancy, j Not engaged to him ! 

Amanda. I should hope not ! 

Susan. If you are not engaged to him why do 
you say you are going to marry him? 

Nancy. For goodness' sake, Margaret, you are 
not going to propose to him yourself, are you? 
(She sits beside Amanda) 

Margaret. (Laughing) Oh, no. It is not quite 
as bad as that. I meant to say nothing about it for 
the present, but in view of Auntie's European 
scheme I think perhaps it will be best to tell the 
whole story. You know Jim and I have always 
been good friends. We were great chums at school 
and while I was away at college we wrote to each 
other, and he came up to see me when he could. 
And not so very long ago he told me that as soon as 
his business was a little more promising he was 
going to ask me to marry him. But he wouldn't let 
me say anything — he wouldn't let me be engaged to 
him because he said he wanted me to be perfectly 
free. But of course I know just what I am going to 
do when the time comes. — So you see, Auntie, I 
have all the romance I need. 

Susan. (Taking Margaret's hand affection- 
ately) Oh, good ! 

Amanda. (Who has shown growing signs of 
distress as Margaret talked) Humph ! I've had 
that kind too. But do you call that romance? 
Lawsy me ! After all the education I've given you ! 



io THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Margaret. Auntie, if you hunted the world over 
you couldn't find a better man than Jim. 

Susan. (Rising) Indeed you couldn't. 

Amanda. (Sharply) Sakes' 'alive ! Can't you 
look any higher than that? His grandfather was 
a blacksmith ! 

Susan. A very good blacksmith, Miss Armen. 
(She walks off to center) 

Amanda. (Dispairingly) My land o' Goshen! 
can't I make you understand! Can't I make you 
see how it is! (Rising) Lords and ladies, dukes 
and grandeur, that's romance ! Balls, theaters, teas 
and flowers and all that sort of thing — that's what 
I want you to have. Party dresses at the supper 
table and everybody savin' My lord and my lady. 
That's what I'm plannin' for you. Why it seems to 
me, if I could just say once, Good-morning, Sir 
Reginald! I'd feel the thrill of it forever. (Turn- 
ing to Margaret) And if you should marry one! 
Sakes' alive ! I guess I'd never stop shoutin' for 
joy. 

Nancy. (Who has been listening eagerly to 
Amanda) Oh, I wish I were in Margaret's place! 

Amanda. (To Nancy, hopefully) Did any 
heroine you ever read about in a novel ever marry 
into a blacksmith's family? 

Nancy. (Shaking her head emphatically) Oh, 
no, never. 

Amanda. (Triumphantly) Of course not. 

Margaret. (Coming around in front of the 
table) But I am not living in a novel, Auntie, I am 
living right here with you. 

Amanda. (Pleadingly) Now, Margaret, don't 
be balky. Ever since you was born I have been 
savin' and plannin' and managin' so that I could 
give you what I have always wanted myself, now 
can't you do just this one little thing for me? 

Margaret. (Leaning dejectedly against the 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. u 

table) It isn't a little thing, Auntie. I don't see 
how I could give up Jim. 

Amanda. It wouldn't be givin' him up. You say 
yourself you ain't engaged. (She sits on the bench 
again) 

Margaret. But, Auntie 

Amanda. Now listen. You just come along with 
me and we'll get into high society. That's all I 
ask — come along and be pleasant. I don't need any 
other promise. When you get up among the lords 
and ladies I know you won't want to come down 
again. Will she, Nancy? 

Nancy. (Sighing) I shouldn't think so. I 
wouldn't. 

Susan. (Coming to Margaret's side) You 
might try it, Margaret. 

Margaret. (Doubtfully) How long will it 
take ? 

Amanda. Well, if we go kinder easy, I've got* 
money to last a year, but if we splurge pretty much 
we'll have to come home in six months. 

Nancy. (Jumping up) I'd like to splurge! 
(She walks excitedly to right) 

Margaret. And when the time is up, if I still 
prefer Jim 

Amanda. I'll never say a word against it. All I 
want is to give you a chance to do better. 

Margaret. (Sighing) Very well, then, I'll go. 

Amanda. (Giving her a joyous hug) My, I'm 
so happy ! 

(Enter Enoch Westervelt and Hen Bush from 
down right. Enoch is a good-natured man, in- 
clined to be plump and already quite gray. 
He is dressed in a linen suit and carries a blue 
cotton handkerchief carelessly in his hand. 
Hen is a good looking, jolly village boy, 
dressed, not carefully, in his Sunday best.) 



12 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Enoch. (Coming in) Hello, hello, there ! 

Hen. Howd'y do ! 

Amanda. How'y do, Enoch ! How are you, 
Hen? 

Margaret. Good-afternoon, Mr. Westervelt. 
Howd'y do, Hen ! 

Susan. Hello! How are you? 

Nancy. (Going to them) You are late. 

Enoch. (Crossing to table) We're just in time 
to treat the girls. Gimme six tickets, Mandy. 

Hen. (Stepping ahead of him) Oh, no, you 
don't ! Gimme two, Miss Armen. Nancy, you are 
goin' to have some cream with me. 

Nancy. (Demurely) Oh, thank you. (She fol- 
lows Hen to the table) 

(Enter Howard Vanter from down right. He is 
trim and slender and looks very spick and span 
in his white flannel suit. He is quick and alert 
in his manner and pulls nervously at his slight 
moustache while he talks.) 

Enoch. Gimme four then, Mandy. Ell take the 
rest of you in. 

Howard. (Crossing to table) Oh, no. Please 
don't. Let me take Miss Margaret in. Good- 
afternoon! How are you all? 

The others. Howard Vanter! 

Amanda. Well, of all things ! I thought you 
was goin' to live in the city for good ! 

Howard. I tried to but I couldn't. You see I 
have too many good friends here in Reedville. 

Nancy. (Delighted) So you are going to spend 
the summer here? 

Howard. I hope to. 

Susan. (Cordially) Fine! 

Howard. (To Margaret) And are you not 
glad that I am going to be here? 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 13 

Margaret. I am glad you are here now, 
Howard, but I will not be here myself this sum- 
mer 

Nancy. {Excitedly, going to Howard) She is 
going to Europe ! Think of it ! And she is going 
to meet all sorts of lords and ladies and have a 
grand time, and it is going to be just like a story 
book! 

Howard. Really ! 

Enoch. You don't mean it! 

Margaret. I am afraid it is true. 

Amanda. (Rising and coining from behind the 
table with tickets and money box) I've just been 
tellin' 'em about it and I'll tell it all to you while we 
eat our cream. 

(Amanda, Margaret, Susan, Howard and Enoch 
go up left.) 

Enoch. (As he follozvs Amanda) Well, I 
snum ! Europe ! 

Hen. It is a long walk back home ! 

Nancy. (Lingering at the table) I wish I were 
going ! 

Hen. (Tucking her hand under his arm) I'm 
glad you ain't. 

(They join the others.) 

Amanda. (As she goes off at left) We are 
going to start just as soon as I can get ready and 
we'll stay maybe a year, and then 

(As they all disappear behind the shrubbery Cindy 
comes down from rear absorbed in her book.) 

Cindy. (Her eyes bulging with excitement as 
she comes doivn) My land o' cotton! He's gwine 



i 4 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

to git her dis time sho\ (Reading) It was a pitch 
dark night as the lubbly heroine stepped out into 
de garden. She felt a hot breath on her cheek, 
she 

{Enter Jim briskly from down right. He is a well 
built, frank, pleasant young man and is dressed 

nozv for traveling.) 

Jim. (Coming in) Hello, Cindy ! 

Cindy. (Nearly falling over in her fright) 
Whow-zv! Lor' sakes, Marse Jim! I don thought 
de villyan had me dat time fo' sho'. 

Jim. (Laughing) I am sorry I frightened you. 
But where is Margaret? (Starting to left) "Out 
here, I suppose. 

Amanda. (From behind shrubbery at left) 
Cindy ! Cindy Brown ! 

Cindy. (Running about in alarm) My land o' 
cotton! Where'll I put it? (She throzvs the book 
dozvn on the bench at left and assumes a very meek 
and pious air as Amanda enters) Yas'm, Miss 
Manyd, I'se yhere. 

Amanda. Well, you ought to be out there 
waiting on the table. 

Cindy. (Hastily) Yas'm, I'se agwine ! (Exit 
quickly at left) 

Jim. (Going to Amanda) How do you do, Miss 
Armen ? 

Amanda. (Walking past his outstretched hand) 
Glad to see you, Jim. I want to talk to you. Sit 
down. 

Jim. (Sitting at the right of the table as Amanda 
takes her place on the bench at left) Thank you, 
Miss Armen. I am glad to have this chance of talk- 
ing to you. I have some good news to tell. 

Amanda. (Grimly) I'll let you talk first then. 

Jim. That is good for I can scarcely wait to tell 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 15 

you. The firm has asked me to start west to-day 
on an important mission for them. I have been 
advanced to a better position than I had hoped for 
for some time to come, and you know what that 
means to me ! 

Amanda. (Stiffly) No. 

Jim. (Delighted) It means that I can ask 
Margaret to be my wife! 

Amanda. I thought you — er — rather liked Mar- 
garet. 

Jim. Liked her! Great Scott! Miss Armen, 
don't you know I have loved her ever since we were 
children at school ? 

Amanda. Then why do you ask her to marry 
you ? 



Jim. (Bewildered) What? Why — er 



Amanda. (Leaning across the table and tapping 
it sharply) Now see here, let's get right down to 
the point. 

Jim. (Hitching his chair closer) Yes, do. 

Amanda. You want to do what is best for Mar- 
garet, don't you? 

Jim. Certainly. 

Amanda. And the best that can be had is none 
too good for her. 

Jim. Of course not. 

Amanda. And Margaret is the sort of a girl 
that even a duke might be proud to have for a wife. 

Jim. (Enthusiastically) Indeed he might! 

Amanda. (Turning on him sharply) Then why 
do you want her to marry into a blacksmith's 
family? Your grandfather was a blacksmith, and 
would you have her marry you when she might just 
as well marry a lord? 

Jim. (Rising) I certainly would. 

Amanda. (Striking the table) Well, I wouldn't. 
And I guess if Margaret took time to think it over 
she wouldn't either, and so I am going to take her 
to Europe. 



i6 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Jim. {Dropping limply back into his chair) 
Europe ! 

Amanda. Yes, Europe, where she can meet 
some lords and make up her mind which she would 
rather have — one of them or you. 

Jim. What does she say about it? 

Amanda. (Evasively) She ain't had much to 
say, but she's goin'. How many girls would miss a 
trip to Europe? (Rising) And the thing for you 
to do is to go right along and tend to that precious 
business of yours and when we come back maybe 
you'll have something to offer her — provided she 
hasn't married someone else in the meantime. 

Jim. (Rising) But you'll let me say good-bye 
to her? 

Amanda. (Moving reluctantly to the right) I 
suppose I'll have to. (Turning back to Jim) But 
first I want your solemn promise not to write to her 
while she is away. 

Jim. (Turning from her) No, I couldn't 
promise that. 

Amanda. It is for her sake I'm askin' it. I want 
her to be free. And don't you know that if there is 
a better chance for happiness than you can give her 
that she ought to have it? (Jim nods thoughtfully) 
Then you'll do as I say ? 

Jim. Well — I — (Turning with sudden decision) 
Yes, I will. 

Amanda. You won't write and you won't send 
any message through anyone else? 

Jim. No, I promise you she shall be perfectly 
free with nothing to remind her of me. 

Amanda. Then I'll call her and she can go with 
you as far as the gate. (Going to left) Good-bye. 
And remember. 

Jim. I will, Miss Armen. Good-bye. 

(Enter Enoch from left.) 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 17 

Enoch. Jumpin' ginger! Mandy ! What are 
you up to? 

Amanda. Em comin' Enoch. (Exit at left) 

Enoch. {Going to Jim) Why, hello, Jim! 
You here ! 

Jim. {Going to meet Enoch) Flow are you, 
Mr. Westervelt? 

Enoch. {Shaking hands with Jim) Em first-' 
rate. But what are you doin' around here this time 
of day? 

Jim. I am just waiting for Margaret to walk out 
to the gate with me. {Looking at his watch) I 
must catch the four-thirty train. 

Enoch. Where are you going to take the train 
to that is better than here? 

Jim. I am going west— out to the coast. 

Enoch. You don't mean it! Going to make 
your fortune? 

Jim. I hope so. 

( They come down a little and Howard enters from 
up left.) 

Enoch. Well, I have made mine — all I need — 
and I always keep some of it handy too, tucked 
away in the stockin'. 

Jim. You don't keep it there yet! 

(Howard steps back and hides among the bushes, 
listening. ) 

Enoch. Yop. Got a cool two thousand hid 
under the corner of my mattress. 

Jim. And you sleep on the first floor with your 
bed right beside the window ! You are practically 
inviting someone to rob you ! 

Enoch. {Going to Jim and laying his hand on 
his arm) Jim, you are the only one who knows or 



18 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

even suspects about that stocking. (Chuckling) It 
is as safe as — Captain Kidd's treasure. 

(Howard steals quietly out at the rear.) 

Jim. I'd feel much happier if you'd put that 
money in the bank. 

Enoch. I couldn't do that. You see I've got to 
keep it handy so when Mandy says yes I'll have it 
all ready to start on the weddin' trip. But here 
comes Margaret. Good-bye, Jim, and lots of good 
luck to you. (They shake hands heartily) 

Jim. Good-bye, Mr. Westervelt, and put that 
money away, won't you ? 

Enoch. (Going up) Oh, now, now! I've got 
to keep it there, I tell you. Have a good trip ! 
(Exit up. left) 

(Enter Margaret from down left.) 

Margaret. (Crossing quickly to him) Oh, Jim, 
don't go yet ! 

Jim. (Going to meet her) I am sorry that I 
must. , 

Margaret. Can't' you wait until the next train? 

Jim. (Taking her hand) Not possibly. I wish 
I could. 

Margaret. There is so much to talk about. Has 
Auntie told you about Europe? 

Jim. Yes, and for your sake I have promised to 
do as she asked. 

( They go to right. ) 

Margaret. So have I. Auntie has been so good 
to me 1 couldn't refuse her anything. 

(As they go out at right Amanda comes in from 
left.) 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 19 

Amanda. So he's gone ! The first step in the 
romance hunt is taken and I ought to be as happy 
as a cricket, (Crossing to right) but all the time I 
can't help wonderin' how that crazy-headed Cindy 
is goin' to manage things while I'm away in Europe. 
(Coming back to center) I can't bear to think of 
everything runnin' to seed and gettin' slip-shod. 

(Enter Howard from rear. He looks about 
cautiously, then, seeing Amanda, comes briskly 
down.) 

Howard. (Coming down.) So you are here! 
And where is Margaret? I have been looking for 
her everywhere. 

Amanda. (With a sigh as she looks off right) 
She's clearin' the way for the romance hunt. Here 
she comes back lookin' like a cat in a thunder storm. 
(Enter Margaret down right dejectedly) Sakes' 
alive, child ! That's no face to w r ear to a strawberry 
festival! (Going to her) And can't you think a 
little bit of the good times ahead? 

Margaret. (Putting her arms around her aunt) 
I am going to try hard to think of it and to help 
you have a good time. (To Howard who has been 
watching them sharply) Are you waiting for us? 

Amanda. (Sweeping off to left) Yes, and 
everybody else is waiting for us, too. Come. (Exit 
at left) 

Howard. (Detaining Margaret) There is no 
hurry. Stay and talk to me. 

Margaret. (Following Amanda) It is so much 
jollier to talk in chorus. Come and join the others. 

(Enter Clem at rear. He is slight, slouching and 
very shabby.) 

Howard. (Following Margaret) Of course, 



20 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

if you'd rather. The aim of my life, Margaret, is to 
please you. (Clem whistles. Margaret is too 
far to the left to see him but Howard, glancing 
over his shoulder, sees him and stops with a startled 
exclamation) Go right on, Margaret, I- — I have 
forgotten something. You'll excuse me, won't you ? 

Margaret. Why, of course. But come back as 
soon as you can. {Exit) 

Clem. {Slouching forward) Well, here I am. 

Howard. {Going back to center) And here you 
go! {Snapping his fingers) Trot right along out 
of this. {He crosses to right) 

Clem. {Coming farther forzvard) I have 
trotted all I am going to. Walked all the way out 
from the city and now I am going to rest a while. 
{He drops into the chair at. the right of the table) 

Howard. {Coming down right) It would have 
been better if you had rested in New York. 

Clem. {Leaning back and smiling at Howard 
over his shoulder) Ah-h ! But I couldn't stay so 
far from you ! You see, Vanter, you can't handle 
pitch without having some of it stick to your hands. 
I am the piece that is going to stick. You have me 
on your hands now and {Stretching out comfort- 
ably) I don't know how you are going to get me off. 

Howard. {Crossing to center) What brought 
you here ? 

Clem. I'm broke. 

Howard. {Turning away from him) That is 
nothing to me. 

Clem. {Sitting up) It has not been thus far — 
but it will be. 

Howard. You are like a phonograph with one 
tune. {Tossing him a coin) Here, go buy yourself 
a new record. 

Clem. {Pocketing the money) Thanks. The 
first payment on what you owe me ! 

Howard. {Coming over to Clem) I have no 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 21 

time to waste. Get down to business. What do you 
want ? 

Clem. A living. You robbed me — literally 
picked my pockets— and the least you can do is to 
give me my bread and butter. 

Howard. (Scornfully) Oh, really ! 

Clem. Yes. really. It took me over a year to 
put my finger on one of your slick deals, but I've 
got you at last and now (Striking the table) I am 
going to make you do it. 

Howard. (Walking off to right) Is that so! 

Clem. What about the Blue Point Mines? 
(Howard starts and stops) It's a tender spot just 
now, isn't it? 

Howard. (Coming back to Clem) Say, what is 
your scheme? Want me to send you a monthly 
allowance ? 

Clem. (Rising) Send me nothing! I am going 
to stay right here and keep you under my eye. I 
am the piece of pitch that is going to S-T-I-C-K. 
(Crosses to right) 

Howard. (At the table) If you suspect that 
something is wrong with the Blue Point Mines why 
don't you start an inquiry? 

Clem. (At right, turning) This is so much 
more artistic! The plan is this: — I shall be your 
shadow. When you drive, I drive ; when you buy a 
new suit, I have one too ; when you travel, I go 
along. And every time you turn around and see 
me you will remember what a mean, sneaking curr 
you are. It is a sort of poetic justice that is coming 
to you. (Crosses to left as Howard goes up right) 
Looking for an exit, are you? Well, there is no 
way out. You can't get rid of me. (Sits at the 
table with an air of finality) I am here to stay. 

Howard. (Striking his open palm) I have it! 
I don't want you to go. (Coming quickly down) 
You are just the one I need ! 



22 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Clem. (Rising and backing away from him) 
No, you don't ! You can't drag me into any of your 
slippery schemes. 

Howard. (Affably) Oh, come now. Things 
are not as bad as they look to you. (He sits easily 
on the edge of the table facing Clem who drops 
down on the bench) I invested some money for 
you and the thing didn't turn out as well as we ex- 
pected and — well, you belong to the class of hard 
looser s and ever since then you have wanted to get 
even. I know how you feel. (Leaning toward 
Clem and speaking soothingly) But what is the 
use of making the worst of things ! You used to 
have a sense of humor. 

Clem. I have yet. It is always getting me into 
some sort of a scrape. 

Howard. You used to be a star in amateur 
theatricals, too, and here is a chance for you to 
shine again. Ha, ha ! The woman who lives here 
is a queer old duck and I'd like to play a joke on 
her. She would be happy forever if she could meet 
a lord, and there is no reason why you should not 
give her the pleasure. 

Clem. (Sitting up, interested) What do you 
mean ? 

Howard. Just this. My father married while 
on a visit to England and he seldom brought my 
mother out here to Reedville, so the people here 
know very little about her. (Laughing) Our 
modesty kept us silent. But now it is time to let 
them know that she belonged to a noble family. 

Clem. What has that to do with me? 

Howard. Oh, you are her sister's son — my own 
dear cousin — Sir Clement Blackwell, Lord of Black- 
mooreland. (Laughing) Can't you see them bow 
and scrape ! The old lady will be a circus all by 
herself. She was going all the way to Europe to 
see a lord, but we will save her the trouble. 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 23 

Clem. (Laughing) Ha-ha! That would be a 
lark! (Jumping up and striding quickly to center) 
By Jove! I'll do it! But, (Turning to Howard 
with sudden suspicion) where do you come in? 

Howard. (Sliding off the table and walking 
slowly up) Oh, I'll come in on the parties and en- 
joy the joke. 

Clem. And besides that? 

Howard. (Reluctantly, turning back) Besides 
that? 1 suppose you may as well know. Besides 
that, if Miss Armen knows that I have such noble 
connections she will be willing to have me marry 
her niece. 

Clem. (Satisfied, walking over to the right) 
So that is it ! 

Howard. (Going over to. him) Yes, that is it. 
And here is my key. Go to my rooms and dress 
in the best you can find, and when you come back 
remember that you are my cousin, Sir Clement, 
who has come over unexpectedly to visit me. 

Clem. (Taking the key and starting np) And, 
believe me, you'll be proud of your cousin ! 

Howard. (Following him up) I'll show you 
how to go. And get back as quickly as possible. 
These parties don't last forever. 

(As they disappear among the shrubbery Amanda 
enters from left followed by Margaret, 
Susan, Nancy, Hen Enoch, Mrs. Berdan 
and Kezia Vreeland. Kezia is a round, jolly 
country woman. Mrs. Berdan is little, always 
wears a bonnet with strings tied under her chin 
and a small black cape over her shoulders. As 
you can plainly see by the expression of her 
face, she lives in a perpetual state of wonder 
and surprise.) 

Susan. (As they come in) Let us go and see 
your new tennis court, Margaret. 



24 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. ' 

Hen. A new tennis court ! Great ! 
Margaret. You will have to use it while I am 
away. 

(The young people start up.) 

Nancy. (Going up). Oh, we'll do that, all right! 

Susan. (To Margaret) But the charm will 
be gone. 

Amanda. Come, Kezia, Mrs. Berdan ! Let us 
all go. 

(The others go up, chatting and laughing, and exit 
at left, but Amanda detains Enoch who is fan- 
ning himself with a red bandanna handker- 
chief. ) 

Amanda. (Catching at his arm impatiently) 
For the land sake, Enoch, put that thing away ! 

Enoch. (Giving the handkerchief a flourish) 
What, this ? 

Amanda. Yes, that. (JTith a gesture of dis- 
gust) You make me so ashamed! (They both 
come down) I have asked and asked you, when 
you come to see me to bring a white one. 

Enoch. (Diving into an inner pocket) And I 
did. (Producing it proudly) There it is! See. 

Amanda. (Coming farther down) Well, what 
good does it do tucked away in your pocket? And 
those ugly old 

Enoch. (Bringing out a blue one and caressing 
them both) Amanda, I like those handkerchiefs. 
Do you know why? 

Amanda. (Turning away front him sharply) 
I certainly do not. 

Enoch. (Following her) I like 'em because 
they are genuine. 

Amanda. Genuine cotton ! 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 25 

Enoch. Yes, genuine cotton, and they don't 
pretend to be anything else. {Holding out the 
folded white handkerchief) Now that, I bought 
for pure linen, but when I got it home I found that 
it was some sort of linenine — a fake, a sham, a 
make believe. That's why I don't like it. What- 
ever Em gettin' — whether it's jewelry or jam or a 
handkerchief — I want it to be genuine. {Taking it 
from his . pocket and giving it to Amanda) Oh, 
here is that book you lent me. 

Amanda. {Taking the book) Did you read it? 

Enoch. (Going to right) Every last word of it, 
and it's no good. 

Amanda. {Horrified) Enoch Westervelt ! 

Enoch. (Turning hack) Folks like it tells 
about never lived on this earth. 

Amanda. They do, too! 

Enoch. Then it's too bad. That's all Eve got to 
say. (Going to her) But you're genuine, Amanda. 
Right down in your heart you are kind and true and 
sensible enough, and I never could see how you let 
this nonsense get ahold of you. 

Amanda. (Going quickly to bench and throwing 
the book down) Nonsense! Enoch Westervelt, 
you are too narrow and countrified for any sort of 
use ! You ought to get out in the world and see 
something. (She flounces over to right) 

Enoch. {Down center) Well, Em willin' ! Eve 
told you often enought that when you marry me, 
we'll go all around this old world and see the whole 
blessed thing, if you like. Eve got the money handy 
to start with any minute you say so. 

Amanda. (Turning on him sharply) There you 
go again! Marry you! (Coming tozvard him) 
How many times must I tell you no — no — NO ! 
Now don't keep on askin' me any more. (She starts 

Enoch. If I don't keep on askin' you, how will 
I know when you change your mind ? 



26 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

.{Enter Kezia from up left, followed by Howard 
and Margaret.) 

Margaret. Oh, Mrs. Vreeland, don't go. We 
have just come to get some chairs so that you would 
have a comfortable place to sit. 

Kezia. {Hurrying down) Don't get any chairs 
for me. I don't like to miss anything, but I'll be 
late for supper as it is. I've got to do some errands 
on my way home. Good-bye, Amanda. 

Amanda. {Stopping at center) Come in soon 
again, Kezia. 

Kezia. {Down right) I'll try to. Good-bye 
everybody. Come and see me ! 

Amanda. We will ! 

All. Good-bye. 

{Exit Kezia down right.) 

Howard. {Going out at left) I'll get those 
chairs. 

Margaret. (To Amanda) Aren't you and Mr. 
Westervelt going to come and watch them play 
tennis? 

Amanda. {Starting up again) I am. 

Margaret. {Going to him) And you, Mr. 
Westervelt, aren't you coming? 

Enoch. {Going up) I guess I'd better be goin'. 

Margaret. {Walking up beside him) Why, 
what is the trouble? 

Enoch. I feel a grouchy spell comin' on and I 
guess I'd better get under cover till it's over. Good- 
bye ! {Exit up right) 

Margaret. I am sorry. Good-bye ! ( Turning 
back and looking off right) Oh, Auntie, here comes 
a stranger ! 

Amanda. {Coming down) Whose comin'? 

Margaret. {Coming down) I don't know, a 
stranger. 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 27 

(Enter Howard from left and with chairs.) 

Howard. (Dropping the chairs and looking off 
right) By Jove ! Clement Blackwell ! 

(Enter Clem from right, carefully dressed, a 
zvalking stick in his hand and the listless slouch 
all gone. He speaks affectedly with an exag- 
gerated English accent.) 

Clem. (Coming forward to greet Howard) 
My word ! So I have found you at last ! And I've 
had a jolly long hunt for you, too! 

Howard. (Shaking hands heartily) This is a 
delightful surprise ! But why didn't you let me 
know you were coming? 

Clem. (Leaning wearily on his cane) Cable- 
grams and letters are .such a beastly nuisance, 
don'cher know. But you are looking quite fit, old 
boy. How are you, though? 

Howard. I am fine, thank you. But let me 
introduce you to my friends. 

Clem. (Adjusting his monocle) Charmed, I 
am sure. 

(Hen enters at rear and stares and gapes during the 
introduction.) 

Howard. Miss Armen, allow me to introduce 
my cousin, Sir Clement Blackwell, Lord of Black- 
mooreland. 

Amanda. A lord ! Your cousin a lord ! M-my 
land o' Goshen ! How — how do you do ? 

Clem. (Bowing) Ah, Miss Armen ! 

Howard. Margaret, Sir Clement. Sir Clement, 
Miss Berry. 

Clem. Charmed I am sure. Delighted to meet 
you, Miss Berry. 



28 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

(Exit Hen up left as Cindy enters down right.) 

Amanda. (Rushing frantically to Cindy while 
Howard, Clem and Margaret talk together near 
center) Oh, Cindy! Quick! Go get some tea 
ready and bring it out here. And some bread and 
jam and cake and everything we've got in the house 
to eat. Howard's cousin has come to see us and 
he's a lord! 

Cindy. (Her eyes bulging) A lord ! Like we've 
been readin' about? 

Amanda. Yes, yes. Hurry, Cindy, hurry ! A 
lord can never live without his afternoon tea. 

Cindy. My land o' honey ! Will I hurry ! Watch 
me! (She runs out, dozvn right with long, leaping 
strides) 

(Hen, leading the tennis players conies in from up 
left and Amanda rushes up to them and talks 
excitedly as they all come down. 

Margaret. (To Clem as she and Clem and 
Howard come, down left) So you have come to 
spend the summer here ! I hope you will like our 
quiet little town, Sir Clement. 

Clem. (Affectedly) If it is quiet I know I 
shall like it. We have been having such a busy time 
at home — so much entertaining, don'cher know. 
Receptions and balls and all that sort of thing. I 
have been da-ancing madly for the last three 
months. I am really quite worn out. 

Amanda. (Coming down) Howard, won't you 
introduce these people? 

Howard. Certainly, Clement ! (He introduces 
Clem zvhile Amanda leads Margaret to right) 

Amanda. (To Margaret) Sakes' alive ! lean 
hardly believe my eyes ! Isn't this grand ! 

Margaret. It is splendid, because, oh, Auntie ! 
now you will not want to go to Europe ! 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 29 

(Enter Cindy from dozen right with a tray on 
which is a white cake, a quart jar of preserves, 
a loaf of bread and half of a pie.) 

Cindy. (Crosses to left) Dis was all I could 
git in de fust grab, Miss Mandy, but I got de kittle 
on an' I'll hab de tea ready in a jiffy. (She sets 
the tray down on the table and goes out again at 
right, only Mrs. Berdan and Howard having no- 
ticed her — Mrs. Berdan with wonder, Howard 
with amusement) 

Mrs. Berdan. (Coming forward) I wanter 
know! You ain't goin' to eat again before supper, 
be you ? 

Amanda. (Haughtily, going iip center) We are 
going to have afternoon tea. 

(Clem, evidently very much attracted, leads 
Susan down left. Nancy, Margaret and Hen 
move to bench at right, Howard, Amanda, and 
Mrs. Berdan stand at center, all &«;' Howard 
talking excitedly and glancing now and then at 
Clem. Howard answers questions with a 
subdued sort of amusement.) 

Clem. (To Susan, dropping some of his 
affectation) I am beginning to think that I should 
like to stay here all winter too. What do you do to 
amuse yourselves in the winter-time ? 

Susan. We go skating and sleigh-riding, and we 
have singing school and spelling matches. (Laugh- 
ing) You w T ould think you were living in the last 
century, I am afraid. 

Clement. I should think I was living in the best 
of all times and places. 

(Enter Cindy briskly from r'uht carrying a big, 
brown tea-pot. Susan and Clement cross to 
right. ) 



3 o THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Cindy. All ready, ladies and gentlemen ! Set 
right up to de table an' I'll git yo' all some cups and 
sassers. (All but Mrs. Berdan and Howard lift 
their hands in astonishment as they turn and see the 
table) Come right along now. Don' be bashful. 
(At the table arranging things) Dere's enough fo' 
all an' ebbery body. Come right along while de tea 
is bilin' hot. (Going to Clement) I reckon, Mr. 
Lord, yo' all mus' be gittin' sort o' crampy-like wait- 
in' fo' your afternoon tea party. 

Amanda. (Coming quickly down) Cindy! 
Keep your place ! 

Cindy. (In sudden panic) Keep my place ! My 
land o' cotton, Miss Mandy, yo' wasn't goin' to 
send me away, was yo' ? 

Amanda. (Surveying the table with dismay) 
Oh, Cindy! 

Cindy. (Hurrying back to table) Ain't it 
enough, Miss Mandy? 

(Enter Rufus from left drying his hands on the 
gingham apron he now wears.) 

Rufus. My land o' sassafras ! 

(Enter Liza Stuebbin from down right. She is 
slender and sharp of voice and feature. Her 
clothes are all meager looking, and she wears a 
red plaid shawl pulled tightly across her thin 
shoulders. She is excited now, her hat is tilted 
to one side and she is generally disheveled.) 

Liza. (Hurrying in) My stars and pumpkins! 
I'm all out of breath. And you wouldn't believe me 
if I was to talk from now on till sunrise, but it is as 
true as I stand here. Nothin' like it ever happened 
before in Reedville, and I couldn't hardly believe it 
mvself when he told me. 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 31 

All. What? What is it? What is the matter? 
Liza. (Dozen right) Matter! Jim Harrison's 
run off with all Enoch Westervelt's money ! 

(Cindy collapses on the bench at left.) 

All. Never ! 

{The following six speeches come in quick succes- 
sion.) 

Howard. Impossible ! 

Hen. Jimminy crimps ! 

Amanda. Mercy on us ! 

Mrs. Berdan. I wanter know ! 

Susan. I don't believe it! 

Hen. Neither do I. 

Liza. (Coming forward) I told you so! I 
knew you wouldn't believe me. (Stopping at cen- 
ter) But it as true as I stand here. I was takin' a 
short-cut through Enoch's yard and I seen and 
heard him through his open window. He'd torn his 
bed apart and w r as lookin' through it. " It's gone ! " 
says he. " Every red cent of it ! " And then I 
stepped up and asked him what, and he was so 
upset that for once in his life he talked right out. 
He'd hid his money in that bed and Jim Harrison 
took it ! 

Susan. How do you know that Jim took it? 

Liza. (TriumpJiantly, going to left) Nobody 
else could have done it. 

Cindy. (Jumping up) Oh, shucks ! Miss Liza. 

(Enter Enoch from dozvn right.) 

Enoch. (To Liza, bitterly) So you've told it 
all, have you ? 

Liza. (Turning to him with satisfaction) Pretty 
nearly. 



32 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Margaret. (Going to Enoch who stands a little 
to the right of center) Tell me that it isn't true. 

Enoch. (Sadly) The money is gone. 

Margaret. (Laying her hand on his arm) But 
Jim 

Ltza. (Dramatically, striding back to center) 
Jim was the only one that knew ! 

CURTAIN. 



ACT II. 



Scene : — The same as Act I except that a second 
table is now covered with a white cloth and 
placed before the bench at right where 
Amanda -sits presiding over a dainty tea serv- 
ice. Mrs. Berdan sits a little back of the table, 
Susan sits to the right of the bench with 
Howard standing behind her, and Margaret 
and Clem stand to the left of the table. 

The Time: — Is three weeks later than the first act. 

Clem. (Affectedly) Really, Miss Armen, Lady 
Nilton's afternoons were a beastly bore compared 
with yours. These are so delightfully different, 
don'cher know! (To Howard) Aren't they, 
cousin ? 

Howard. Decidedly. 

Mrs. Berdan. I wanter know! (To Howard) 
Was you there, too? 

Howard. Oh, yes. I always call on Lady Nilton 
when I go to England. 

Amanda. Do tell ! And you've never said a 
word to us about it ! 

Susan. Howard can keep his own council better 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 33 

than any one else I know. (She sets her cup on the 
table and rises) 

Howard. Don't be too hard on me, Susan. You 
know right well that if I had come home and told 
about all the loi ds and ladies I had met abroad you 
would have thought me an insufferable nuisance. 

Amanda. (Eagerly) We won't now. Do tell 
us about Lad\ Hilton's parties. 

Margaret. And some of your other experiences 
in England too. Howard, I am sure you have some 
more surprises in store for us. 

Susan. (Crossing to left) I am sure he has. 

Amanda. Pass the cake to Sir Clement, some- 
body. 

Howard. (Springing forward) Allow me! 
(Passes cake to Clem) It is a pleasure to serve Sir 
Clement. 

Clem. (Helping himself) Ah-h, really! And 
there is nothing that pleases me better than to eat 
such delicious cake and to listen to my cousin talk. 
(Going to bench down left) But, come, Miss 
Berry, let us leave that chair for him — he must be 
comfortable while he talks. 

(Clem and Margaret sit on bench, and Howard, 
disgusted, goes to chair beside Mrs. Berdan. 
Susan returns to the table, turn 'nig, now and 
then, with a troubled look at Clem and 
Margaret. ) 

Amanda. (Eagerly to Howard) Tell us about 
Sir Clement's home. I just know it is a grand old 
place with ruins in the yard ! 

(Howard nods and begins to talk as Nancy runs 
in. ) 

Nancy. (Coming in) Good-afternoon, Sir 



34 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Clement! Howd'y do, Margaret! (Waving her 
hand to the others) Howd'y do, everybody! 

The others. (Except Clem who simply rises 
and bows) Good-afternoon, Nancy. 

(Amanda rises and goes to Howard.) 

Nancy. (Fluttering over to Clem) Oh, Sir 
Clement, will you be here to the lawn party to- 
night ? 

Clem. Certainly, Miss Reed. I wouldn't miss it 
for the world. 

Nancy. But there are to be races at Harverhay 
to-morrow and you'd have to go to-night to be there 
in time. 

Clem. Do you want me to go? 

Nancy. Oh, dear me, no ! But Englishmen 
always do go to races. 

Clem. (Sriking an attitude and staring through 
his monocle) Ah-h ! That is because they have 
nothing better to do, poor fellows! If they lived 
here in Reedville they would never think of such a 
thing. 

Margaret. (Rising) I am glad you are so well 
entertained, Sir Clement. Come and have some 
more tea. 

(As they go up right to the table, Howard and 
Amanda come dozvn left talking earnestly.) 

Howard. (Coming down with Amanda, as the 
others gather about the table chatting and laughing) 
I don't mind telling you, Miss Armen, but please 
do not let it get about. 

Amanda. I won't whisper it to a soul. 

Howard. Then I am going to tell you a secret 
that I have guarded very carefully. When a certain 
old uncle of mine gets through with his title he is 
going to pass it on to me. 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 35 

Amanda. (Dozen center) You! A title ! 

Howard. Yes. I shall be Lord Brightmoore- 
land. The estate joins my cousin's and my title is 
of exactly the same value as his. 

Amanda. And to think we have been livin' near 
neighbors to you all these years and never guessed 
it! 

Howard. And please do not let any one guess it 
now, either. It would be very embarrassing to me 
here where every one is just plain Mister, or Jack, 
or Sam. Sir Clement does not mind because he is 
used to it, but I — Well, I like my old friends to 
just speak to me as they always have. 

Amanda. Just think of all that's happened this 
last month, and I didn't have to go to Europe for it 
either ! 

Howard. And Margaret 

Amanda. (Sitting on bench down left) Oh, I 
was just goin' to speak about Margaret. I think she 
takes to Sir Clement right well, don't you? 

Howard. (Solemnly) I hope not. 

Amanda. (Half rising) You hope not! For 
goodness' sakes, why? 

Howard. Because, Miss Armen, his affections 
are otherwise engaged. 

Amanda. My land o' Goshen ! Then we'll have 
to go to Europe after all ! 

Howard. (Leaning comfortably back against the 
table) I don't see why. 

Amanda. But if Margaret is going to marry a 
lord! 

Howard. (Taking the chair at right of the table 
a little forzvard and sitting) I have just told you 
that my title is as good as his and I will marry 
Margaret to-morrow, if she says so. You have not 
lost anything. And it would not be wise to let 
Margaret marry a strange lord. Some of them are 
not quite up to the mark. Many of them are very 



36 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

poor and marry American girls for their money. 
You know / wouldn't do that. 

Amanda. Yes, you've got all the money you 
need. I guess you could buy all Reedville if you 
wanted to. 

Howard. And then there is this advantage, Miss 
Armen, — you have known me all your life. 

Amanda. And yet there is a whole lot I didn't 
know about you ! 

Howard. And remember, you are not to tell the 
things you have just found out. 

Amanda. Not even to Margaret? 

Howard. Oh, no. I particularly do not want 
Margaret to know. You see, I want the title and all 
that to be a surprise to her — a— er — sort of wed- 
ding present. 

Amanda. My land o' Goshen ! If it ain't just 
like you'd read about in a book ! Lords just pourin' 
down ! Do you think any more of your folks will 
be comin' over soon? (She rises) 

Clem. (Coming down) Really, cousin, I need 
your help. They're telling jokes and riddles. 
American ones, and they're quite beyond me, 
don'cher know ! 

(Enter Hen dozvn right. He has just come from 
the hay fields and wears a broad straw hat, his 
sleeves are rolled up, his shirt is open at the 
throat and he carries a rake.) 

Margaret. Oh, here is Hen ! 

Howard. How are you, Hen ? 

Susan. Hello ! 

Margaret. (At table) You are just in time. 
Come here. 

Hen. (Embarrassed) Oh, no, thank you. (To 
all) Good-afternoon. (To Margaret) I have 
just come in from the hay fields, I didn't know you 
were having a party. 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 37 

Susan. (Coming cordially down to him) We 
are always having a party these days, but the more 
the merrier. Don't go ! 

Clem. My word, no! Don't go, Mr. Bush. 

Margaret. (Looking off right) We need your 
help. Here comes Cindy with the lanterns to hang 
for the party to-night. 

(Enter Rufus and Cindy from down right with a 
clotJies-basket filled with Chinese lanterns.) 

Cindy. (Coming in) Git-ap, Tangle-foot! 
Can't you all gallop a little ! Step along, now ! 
Make yo'self lively. 

Rufus. (Protesting) Now, Cindy, I'se agwine 
to 

Cindy. You'se agwine to git busy. Yo' all can't 
call on me and sit lazin' around like white folks. 

(As they reach the middle of the lawn they stop 
and put the basket down and the others all 
gather around it.) 

Nancy. (Leaning over the basket) Oh, aren't 
they pretty ones ! 

Amanda. (Taking a roll of wire from the 
basket) Here, Cindy — Rufus — Take this and 
stretch it across the tennis court. You know how. 

Cindy. (Taking it) Yas'm I knows how. Git 
along dere, Tangle-foot! Git-ap wid yo'. (Exit 
Cindy up left, driving the protesting Rufus ahead 
of her) 

Margaret. (Going to the basket) Let us hang 
some of them right to the trees. 

The others. Good! Fine! Just the thing! 

(They select lanterns and start out in different di- 
rections to hang them.) 



38 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Susan. (Starting up left) I'll hang up these ! 
Nancy. (Going up right, taking Clem with her, 
much to Hen's disgust) And I'll put these up here ! 

(Hen follows Susan, but zvatches Nancy un- 
happily. ) 

Amanda. (Going up) Come, Mrs. Berdan, you 
and I'll go and see what Cindy and Rufus are up to. 

(They go out up left.) 

Margaret. (Rising from her knee at the basket 
and looking about, a lantern in each hand) Where 
shall I hang these? 

Howard. (Taking one lantern from her) We'll 
attend to that afterwards. Now I must finish what 
I have been trying to tell you for the past week. 
Margaret, I 

Margaret. (Avoiding him and crossing to the 
left) Oh, tell me about the weather or something 
nice and interesting like that. Do you think it will 
rain to-morrow? 

Howard. (Following her) This means so much 
to me, please don't be frivolous. 

Margaret. (Swinging her other lantern as she 
zvalks back to right) But I am frivolous. I think 
of a dozen jolly things a minute. I can't discuss 
one subject forever as you do. 

Howard. I can't help it, Margaret, all of my 
thoughts lead to you. 

Margaret. (Sighing) How monotonous ! 

Howard. It would please your aunt if you 
married me. 

Margaret. (Surprised, stopping in her walk) 
It would ! 

Howard. Very much. 

Margaret. When did she change her mind? 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 39 

Howard. I fancy she began to change it when 
my cousin arrived. 

Margaret. (Crossing to left) Howard, why 
did you never tell us about him? 

Howard. Do you think it would have been nice 
of us to go around boasting about our noble con- 
nections ? 

Margaret. (Sitting on bench) You need not 
have boasted. And your father never mentioned 
him either. 

Howard. (Leaning over the back of the chair at 
right of table and nervously twisting his moustache) 
No. Er — Father always cautioned us not to. You 
see titles are not as popular here as they might be. 
And besides, isn't it better to be valued for what 
you are instead of propping up your reputation with 
a title ? 

Margaret. (Rising and starting back to right) 
Of course it is — but — Well, you don't mind using 
your titled cousin to influence Auntie. 

Howard. (Injured) How could I help it that 
Clem came over here? 

Margaret. (Relenting a little) Perhaps you 
couldn't. But let us talk of something else. 

Howard. (Following her) Very well. I have 
something else very important to say to you — about 
Jim. (Margaret stops, startled) Have you writ- 
ten him? 

Margaret. Since when have you been super- 
visor of my correspondence? 

Howard. Don't be angry. I am only speaking 
for his good. Don't ask him to come back. Mr. 
Westervelt will never push the matter while he is 
away, but if he returns I am afraid he will 

Margaret. Do all he can to prove Jim innocent ! 
(Goes down right) 

Howard. (Turning back to center) All he can, 
but he can't do much. If you have even a little 



40 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

friendly feeling for Jim you will beg him not to 
come. 

Margaret. (Starting back to left) If I could 
manage it Jim would be here now to face all the 
falsehoods that have been told about him. 

Howard. But you can't? He isn't coming? 

Margaret. (Turning away from him) I — I 
haven't heard from him. 

Howard. (Drawing a deep breath of relief) 
Ah-h ! You see he — does not dare come back ! 

Susan. (Coming quickly down, followed by 
Hen) See, Margaret, where we have put them! 

Margaret. (Turning to admire) Oh, aren't 
they pretty! (She and Howard go up) 

Nancy. (Hurrying down to the basket) Oh, 
give me some more lanterns to hang ! ' You stay 
there, Sir Clement, I'll bring them. 

(But Clem joins Susan as she goes up zvith more 
lanterns and Hen detains Nancy.) 

Susan. (Going up) I'll put these back on the 
apple tree. 

Clem. (Following her) And I will help you. 

( Business of hanging the lanterns and pleasant 
dallying in the background.) 

Hen. (Leading Nancy forzvard) Nancy, I am 
getting tired of this. 

Nancy. (Purposely misunderstanding him) 
You haven't begun yet. 

Hen. You know what I mean. 

Nancy. (Airily) Oh, do I ? 
' Hen. I want to know whether we are engaged 
or not. 

Nancy. (Lightly, going down to table) Aren't 
we? 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 41 

IIi:n. (Follow'uu/ her) Well, / haven't broken 

it off. 

Nancy. (Moving away from him) Have I? 

Ukn. You act as if you'd like to. What is the 
trouble? What have I done? (Nancy sits on 
bench, turns azvay from him and does not answer) 
Tell me what I have done. 

Nancy. (Reluctantly) Nothing. 

Hen. (Standing beside her) Then what is the 
trouble ? 

Nancy. (Pouting) I didn't say there was any 
trouble, did I ? 

Hen. You have acted it. Ever since that Eng- 
lish dude came here with his fancy manners 
you 

Nancy. (Rising) It would be a good thing if 
you copied some of those manners. The idea of 
coming to a tea party looking as you do this minute ! 
(She crosses to right) 

Hen. (Gently), You know I didn't mean to. I 
didn't know 

Nancy. You did it just the same, and you do 
other things too. And — and 

Hen. What has made you angry? 

Nancy. (Passionately, stopping down right) I 
am not angry. It — it is just 

Hen. What? Give me something that sounds 
like half a reason. 

Nancy. Well, it is this: — Now that I have met 
a lord and had afternoon tea every day for a while 
I am not as anxious as I was to be plain Mrs. Bush 
and stay at home and wash dishes and get the sup- 
per. 

Hen. You would not have to stay at home all 
the time and you could have some one to help you 
with the work. 

Nancy. (Going up, half crying) Rut I don't 
w T ant to be plain Mrs.! (With a sudden change' of 



42 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

manner as she meets Clem and Susan coming 
down) I have some more lanterns to hang, Sir 
Clement. 

Hen. (Stepping between them) Don't trouble 
Sir Clement. I'll help you put them up. 

Clem. Aw, thanks awfully. (To Susan) 
Shall we get some more? (Exit Nancy and Hen 
at left talking earnestly) This is the best part of 
the whole show, isn't it? 

Susan. (At the basket) You said that just like 
a thoroughbred American. 

Clem. And I am going to say more things just 
like it. Here are some lanterns without candles, let 
us fix them. 

(They take the lanterns and a box of candles down 
to bench at left.) 

Susan. You always drop some of your English 
accent when you talk to me ; my Yankee twang must 
be catching. (She sits on bench) 

Clem. (Sitting in chair to the right of bench) 
When you see me again I hope I will have learned 
some of the other good lessons you teach. 

Susan. (Surprised) When I see you again! 

Clem. Yes, I am going away. (Putting aside 
the lantern he zvas busy with and speaking very 
seriously) I am tired of idling around like this and 
I am going to get to work. I am going to do some- 
thing useful if it is only to help the Ginnies dig a 
ditch. If I can't get any further, I am going to be 
a plain, honest man and earn my own living. 

Susan. When are you going.' 

Clem. At once. 

Susan. But you will come to the party to-night? 

Clem. No. I said I would but about twenty 
minutes ago I changed my mind. I decided then 
what to do and I am going to do it immediately. I 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 43 

can't stand this any longer — not another hour. I 
am through with shams and pretense and I am 
going to cut loose (rising) right now. 

Susan. (Rising) Not this minute ! 

Clem. The quicker the better. 

Susan. (Going to him) But they will all be so 
disappointed. Aren't you even going to say good- 
bye ? 

Clem. Only to you. I want you to understand 
why I am going.. 

Susan. But I don't — fully. (Crosses to his 
right) 

Clem. I — (Shaking his head) No I am not 
going to say any more just now. But I am doing 
the best I can see to do — I am trying to get back 
to real things and (laughing) when I return I hope 
both you and Mr. Westervelt will label me a genu- 
ine article. 

Susan. We can do that now. (Clem turns his 
head away) I think you are a little foolish to leave 
like this — so suddenly and with so little explanation. 

Clem. (Going to left) I know it looks badly, 
but — (Turning back) Well, it seems to me the 
only way — to drop the worthless and get after the 
good as soon as you see it. And — (Going to Susan) 
I think you trust me, don't you ? 

Susan. Of course I do! 

Clem. That is a comfort. I shall remember it. 
Good-bye. 

Susan. (Taking his offered hand) Good-bye. 
But I wish you were not quite so — so impatient. 

Clem. Some day I will tell you all about it. I 
have been foolish, that is all. But now I am going 
to be — worth while, I hope. Good-bye. 

(Enter Amanda at rear.) 

Amanda. Susan, come here. Quick! 



44 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Susan. (Hurrying up) I am coming. Good- 
bye, Sir Clement. 

(Enter Margaret down right. Clem stands gazing 
after Susan, turns suddenly and collides with 
Margaret. ) 

Margaret. Oh, Sir Clement! 

Clem. I beg your pardon ! I — I — I 



(Enter Howard down right.) 

Margaret. (Laughing) That's all right. I saw 
how it was. (She follows Susan) You are for- 
given. 

(Exit Amanda and Susan up right.) 

Clem. (Following Margaret) It was very 
awkward of me. I — I 

Margaret. (Going up) We all have our 
awkward moments. Don't worry. (She follows 
Susan out and Clem, turning quickly finds Howard 
standing directly in his path, glaring at him) 

Clem. So you are here ! 

Howard. (Stepping up to Clem) Yes, and I 
want this stopped. 

Clem. (Coming down) It is going to be. 

Howard. Margaret is 

Clem. (Turning to him, stir prised) Oh, 
Margaret! Is that what you are growling about? 
Well, set your mind at ease. I have spoken a good 
word for you both to her and her aunt whenever I 
could. I have done more for you than most sane 
men would, but (Laughing) I couldn't help it. It 
was wonderful to see how much the aunt would 
swallow ! Poor old lady ! She's a good sort in 
spite of her foolishness. (Down left) But now I 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 45 

am through with the whole thing. I am going away. 
I've quit. Thrown up my job. 

Howard. (Coming down center) What is the 
trouble ? 

Clem. (Going to right) I am sick of it— that's 
all. It was all right at first when it just looked like 
a joke, but now when the other side begins to show 
up — (Turning back) Oh, there is no use in trying 
to explain to you ! 

Howard. (Over by table) None whatever. 
You went into this thing with your eyes open. Now 
don't play the saintly innocent ! You knew what 
you were doing. 

Clem. I should have known had I stopped to 
think, but it just seemed like a lark, and now 

Howard. And now you are going to be a quitter 
and leave just when you might have been of some 
use. 

Clem. There is nothing more that I could or 
would do for you. 

Howard. If you are going to leave me in this 
way I hope you don't expect me ever to help you 
out of any scrape. (Goes up) Good-bye. I wash 
my hands of you. 

Clem. (Going to center) That is the best thing 
you ever did for me. (Enter Amanda briskly down 
right as Howard goes out at rear) Now for a new 
start! (Turning quickly he collides with Amanda) 
Gracious ! 

Amanda. Lawsy me ! I hope I didn't hurt you, 
Sir Clement. Sakes' alive ! We haven't got so 
many lords around here that we can afford to be 
careless with 'em yet. You're sure you ain't hurt? 

Clem. Very sure, Miss Armen, and I am glad 
to see you. I think, after all, I'd better tell you 
something right now. I was not going to speak 
about it but, on second thought, perhaps it would be 
best to make a clean breast of it at once. I er 



46 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Amanda. (Affably) Don't mind me, Sir Clem- 
ent, speak right out. 

Clem. (Fidgeting nervously as he moves to left) 
It is not an easy thing to say. You have been very 
kind to me, Miss Armen, and you have led me to 
believe that — er — um— you — er- — respected me and 
— er — well — I — er- — want you to know that I ap- 
preciate it more, perhaps, than you realize. You 
have— er — been very good to me and now — er — I 
Well, I want you to know — You never would have 
suspected it so I will have to tell you — er — — 

Amanda. Good lands! If Howard hadn't told 
me what he did I would have thought that you was 
tryin' to tell me you was in love with Margaret ! 

Clem. (Going to her) Oh, no. Far from it! 
I want to ask you — — 

Amanda. ME! You want to ask me! (Flut- 
tering about in a great state of excitement) My 
goodness, gracious sakes alive ! You want to ask 
me ! Well, I never in all my life ! But that's the 
way it goes in books. The thing you don't expect 
always comes and the good deservin' heroine gets 
the lord ! Lawsy me ! Let's go right over and tell 
the folks about it ! 

Clem. (JJlw has nearly collapsed from the 
shock) No, no, no, no! Please don't. (Mopping 
his brow) It really wouldn't — er — Well, it is not 
the way they do in England. And— er— well, you 
see this is so sudden that I feel sort of upset. (He 
sinks down on bench at left) 

Amanda. (At center) Upset don't tell the 
half! I can guess how you feel. 

Clem. (Distracted) But you can't! Great 
Scott! What shall I do! (Jumping up) What 
can I say ! How can I tell you ! 

Amanda. (Soothingly, going to him) Don't 
try just now. Sort of calm yourself down — my 
hero! (Clem sinks back on the bench and groans) 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 47 

And to think of me being Lady Amanda! (Flut- 
tering off again) Well, I can't hardly grasp it, 

Clem. (His head in his hands) Neither can I! 

Amanda. A romance like this was well worth 
waitin' for. Lady Amanda Rlackwell ! Think of it ! 

Clem. (Groaning) Must I ? 

Amanda. What will the neighbors say, I wonder ! 

Clem. I wonder ! 

(Enter Margaret at rear.) 

Amanda. I guess they'll believe in romance now ! 

Margaret. (Coming down) Oh, Auntie, please 
come and tell us about these extra benches. 

Amanda. Lawsy me ! Sakes alive ! How am I 
ever goin' to face everybody and not tell ! I'm 
comin', Margaret. 

(As she hurries up to Margaret, Hen and Nancy 
come back from left, Susan and Howard and 
Mrs. Berdan come in from rear and Clem 
slips out at left unnoticed.) 

Susan. (Looking off right as she comes down) 
Here comes Liza Stuebbin ! 

Mrs. Berdan. Runnin' like mad ! 

Amanda. (Looking off left) And here comes 
Enoch Westervelt like all the dogs was after him ! 
Land sakes ! I wonder what's goin' to happen now ! 

Mrs. Berdan. I wanter know! 

Hen. (Looking off left) Just see him leg it ! 

Howard. I'll bet on Liza ! 

Susan. (Laughing) So will I. 

Margaret. She is at the gate. 

Nancy. (Excitedly) Mr. Westervelt is here! 

(Enter Enoch from left, limp, warm and out of 
breath.) 



48 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Enoch. (Fanning himself with his handker- 
chief) Whew-w-w ! I — I'm 

Susan. (Placing a chair at center) Sit down, 
Mr. Westervelt, and get your breath. 

(He drops into the chair panting.) 

Margaret. 1 ( Crowding about Ww j Let me 

Hen CY ' I fan you ' Mr ' Westervelt! 

Amanda. (Snatching off his hat and fanning 

him with it) For the land sakes ! Enoch, what's 
the matter? 

(Enoch gasps but can not answer.) 

Margaret. Shall I get you a drink? 

(Enoch gasps and shakes his head.) 

Mrs. Berdan. Breathe through your nose, Mr. 
Westervelt. You'll catch it faster. 

(Enter Liza hurriedly down right.) 

Liza. (Coming in) Land sakes! I — I— I — 
Umm-m-m — (She can say no more and sinks into 
the chair that is quickly placed for her to the right 
of Enoch) 

Mrs. Berdan. (Clasping her hands) Plumb 
beat out ! My sakes' alive ! 

Amanda. (Fluttering excitedly about Liza) 
My land o' Goshen ! She must be far gone when 
she can't talk ! 

Susan. (Going to Liza) We'll fan her, too. 

(Susan, Mrs. Berdan and Amanda fan Liza, and 
Margaret, Nancy and Hen attend to Enoch, 
Howard stands aloof.) 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 49 

Mrs. Berdan. {Running about excitedly, look- 
ing for something to fan with) Such goin's on! 
Such foolishness ! What's gettin' into folks ! (She 
snatches a plate from the table and fans with that) 

Margaret. (To Enoch) Do you feel better? 

(Enoch nods.) 
Amanda. (To Liza) Are you all right, Liza? 

(Liza nods.) 
Nancy. (To Hen) Fan harder. 
(Hen obeys vigorously.) 
Susan. Undo her bonnet strings. 

(She unties Liza's bonnet.) 

Margaret. (To Enoch) How are you? 

Enoch. B-b-b-better. 

Mrs. Berdan. (Fanning with the plate) Well, 
I never ! You would never catch me loosin' my 
head like this ! 

Amanda. (As Liza struggles to speak) Lawsy 
me ! She ain't got her talkin' breath yet ! 

Enoch. (Straightening up so suddenly that the 
others are startled) I have! She's been spyin' on 
me and tryin' to find out all my business, but if it's 
got to be told, I'll tell it myself. 

Liza. (Sitting up smartly) No, you won't! 
He's been telegraphin' all over the country, that's 
what he's been doin'. 

Enoch. And I'm goin' to do it some more, too. 

Liza. (Nodding emphatically) He knows some- 
thing that ought to be told. Meddlin' with such 
things ain't respectable, and if he won't tell what he 
ought to I'll shame him into it. 



50 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Enoch. I knew you'd haul some slander into it. 
But you can't make me talk. 

Liza. (Springing up) Well, I ain't afraid to 
tell what I know. (Enoch jumps up as if to speak 
but stands dumb with astonishment) A stranger 
came to town here more'n three weeks ago and was 
seen goin' into Howard Vanter's house and nothin's 
been seen of him since. Gone ! Every hide and 
hair of him. (Shaking her finger at Enoch) And 
you know all about it and you're tryin' to hide it all. 
What became of him? 

Mrs. Berdan. (Clasping her hands) I wanter 
know ! 

Enoch. Why don't you ask Howard ? 

(Howard is alarmed.) 

Liza. (Stepping closer to Enoch) It is you 
that is doin' all the telegraphin' and fuss. 

Amanda. (Pulling at Liza's shawl) Liza, how 
you talk ! 

Liza. (Jerking away and going to left) If that 
man ain't found pretty quick I'll let the constable 
know about it, I will. The men in this town ain't 
got spunk enough to catch a mosquito, but / 

Enoch. If that man went to Howard's house 
what business is it of mine? 

Liza. (Turning sharply) You think he stole 
your money. 

All. OH-h-h! 

Liza. (Coming back to center) You're tele- 
graphin' to him every day. 

Enoch. I am not. 

Liza. (Keenly) Then who is it to? 

Enoch. Wouldn't you like to know ! 

Liza. (Hotly) You old — clam! 

Howard. (Going to Liza with a fine show of 
carelessness) Now, Miss Stuebbin, aren't you 
going a bit too fast? Please tell us, if you can, how 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 



5i 



you know that a man went to my house and disap- 
peared? Aren't vou letting your imagination run 
wild? 

Liza. Imagination ! Lib Stannard was in town 
that day and she seen him. I saw her last week and 
she told me what he looked like and how he was 
dressed and all, and ever since I've been askin' folks 
about him and he was never seen again anywhere 
around. Far as anybody knows he never left your 
house. 

Howard. But aren't you getting things rather 
mixed? If he never left my house, how could Mr. 
Westervelt be telegraphing to him I 

Liza. Then who is he telegraphin' to? 

Howard. That does not concern me, but it does 
concern me very much that you are making such a 
serious charge against me. You are accusing me of 
foul play and (severely) unless you can prove what 
you say, you can be severely punished. 

Liza. (Defiantly) I ain't said but what's true. 
That man went into your house three weeks ago 
and no one that looks like him has ever come out of 
it again. There now, you prove somethin' ! (Her 
chin in the air, she strides over to right) 



(All of the others begin to talk at once.) 
Margaret. 
Susan. 



Mrs. Berdan. 
Hen. 

Nancy. 
Amanda. 



I never heard, of such nonsense 
in all my life ! 

This is ridiculous ! Why, it 
couldn't be ! 

I wanter know! Who ever 
would have thought it ! 

Let's get down to facts! What 
did he look like? 

Oh, dear me ! Isn't this dread- 
ful ! 

This does beat everythin' I ever 
knew! I'm all upset! 



52 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 



Enoch. Don't you believe a word she says. She 
knows as much about that man as she does about 
my telgraphin'. 

Liza. I know a good sight more than you think 
I do. And you'll find out pretty soon that it don't 
pay to keep your mouth as tight shut as you try to. 

(Again they all talk together excitedly.) 

Margaret. The idea of thinking such a 

thing could happen here! 

Mrs. Berdan. My, my, though for all ! Don't 
it beat everything! 

Susan. Why haven't we heard some- 

thing about this before? 

Hen. What did he look like? I want 

to know what he looked like. 

Nancy. Isn't this horrible! I'll have a 

nightmare to-night ! 

Amanda. Lawsy me ! I don't see how 

such things can be ! 

Liza I guess I know a thing or two. 

I've got my eyes open if 
nobody else has and I 
know what's goin' on, and 
what I don't know I'm 
goin' to find out about 
I guess I am awake if no 
one else in town is. 

Enoch. (Walking about with energetic ges- 
tures) Stop! Hush! Stop all talkin' at once! 
Stop a minute ! Stop, I say. Jimminy mustard ! 
STOP! 



(Everybody stops suddenly and there is a moment 
of absolute silence.) 



Liza. (To Enoch) Humph! 
somethin' that time, didn't you? 



You most said 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 53 

Howard. If you will excuse me I think I'll go. 

(As Howard starts to right Rufus and Cindy come 
skipping in from down left.) 

Rufus. 1 My land o' honey, people, 

did yo' all hear de news ? 
(Together) 

Iindy. Folkes ! Folkes ! Did yo' 

all hear what's hap- 
pened ? 

The others. Yes, I believe we have! 

Liza. (Folding her hands complacently) There 
ain't nothin' more to tell. 

Rufus. 1 (Joyously) He's come! He's come! 



Cindy. 
All. JIM! 



Marse Jim's home 



QUICK CURTAIN. 



ACT III. 

Scene: — The same as in Act II, but it is evening 
now and the Chinese lanterns are all hung and 
lit. Amanda is heard off right calling Rufus. 
She comes in down right, dressed in a light 
elaborate gown. 

Amanda. (Coming in) Ru-ufus ! (Enter 
Rufus from up left, a lighted taper in his hand) 
Hurry, Rufus, and get the lanterns lit. The folks 
may be here any minute. 

Rufus. (Shambling down) I'se ahurryin' like 
a house afire. (Exit down left) 



54 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

(Bnter Cindy down right. She is dressed for the 
evening in a white dress with big red polka-dots 
in it. Over her arm she carries a white shawl. ) 

Amanda. {Walking about distratcedly) Oh, 
Cindy, I am just about wild ! With what has hap- 
pened and what may happen I am all of a fluster. 

Cindy. (Crossing to left) Dat's jest de way 
wid me. I'se quite discombobulated. 

Amanda. But I'll do my best. That is all that 
can be asked of me. 

Cindy. Dat's right, Miss Mandy. 

Amanda. (Nervously smoothing her hair and 
straightening her dress) Is the lemonade made, 
and the cake cut, and did the ice-cream come? 

Cindy. Yas'm. Yas'm. Yas'm. 

Amanda. (Sighing) I don't know how it is, 
one-half of me is all for lords and ladies and the 
other half is all for housekeepin' ! My! but I'm 
glad I didn't have to go to Europe, right in pre- 
servin' time and all ! 

Cindy. (Going up) Dat's right. I'se kinder 
mixed in my feelin's myself. (Dramatically) 
Stand back, yo' no account villvan ! I s-corn yo', 
I do! 

Amanda. Mercy! What's the matter? 

Cindy. (Coming dozvn) Dere ain't nothin' de 
matter. I'se jest tryin' to sozzle out how I'se goin' 
to act to-night. (Taking book from under her 
shawl) In dis yhere novel de hero wine, when one 
feller proposes to her, jest lambastes him for fair. 
" I s-s-scorn yo'," says she. My land o' honey! I'd 
jest love to scorn somebody like dat ! But — I'se 
only got one beau an' if I scorn him too hard he 
won't come back again. (Going to Amanda) 
Say, Miss Mandy, I'se jest been kinder wonderin' — 
ain't dere no black lords and ladies and kings and 
such like? 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 55 

Amanda. Why — er — yes. Out in the Cannibal 
Islands — or somewhere. 

Cindy. {Skipping about and clapping her hands) 
I hab it ! I hat> it ! Rufomeo'll be king and I'll be 
queen ob de Cannibal Isles ! 

Amanda. Sakes' alive ! Do stop carryin' on. 
Are the sandwiches made? 

Cindy. {Dancing over to left) Maybe dey is, 
maybe dey ain't. I'se gwine up in society, too! 
I'se gwine to find some romance, too! 

Amanda. Cindy, the sandwiches 

Cindy. {Vaguely, going to right) Oh, yas'm — 
de sandwiches. I'll kinder look after 'em, Miss 
Mandy. {Exit down right) 

Amanda. If I only dared I'd act like that, too. 
Lady Amanda! Think of it! {Exit down right) 

{Enter Howard from left.) 

Howard. {Coming forzvard) I wonder if she 
will come. If I could only have kept Jim away for 
a while!. Still, if I can get Margaret's promise to- 
night it is as good as gold. And I have her aunt on 
my side. {Enter Rufus up left, zvaving his taper 
and singing) Well, you seem happy to-night. 

Rufus. {Coming dozvn) Cracky though! Dat 
yo', Marse Howard? 

Howard. It surely is. Did you give Miss Mar- 
garet my note ? 

Rufus. Yop, I sho' did. 

Howard. And what did she say? 

Rufus. {Dozvn center scratching his head) I 
jest disremember what she say, but I kinder think — 
er 

Howard. {Eagerly) That she will come? 

Rufus. {Catching gladly at the idea) Um- 
m-m. Yes, I reckon dat's what I think. 

Howard. Did she tell you that she would meet 
me here to-night before the others came? 



56 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Rufus. You'd be kinder disapinted if she didn't, 
wouldn't yo' ? 

Howard. I certainly would. 

Rufus. (Going up) Well, Miss Margaret ain't 
no hand to disapint folks. 

Howard. (Holding his watch close to a lantern 
down right) She ought to be here soon. (Snap- 
ping his zvatch shut) How glad I'll be to get out of 
this miserable hole in the woods! (Walking about 
restlessly) What a fool I was to meddle with 
Enoch Westervelt's money ! But I needed it just 
then to tide me over a rough spot. And I have 
crawled out of tighter places ! (Exit at left) 

(Enter Cindy down right. The shawl is now 
draped over her head and shoidders.) 

Cindy. (Crossing to left) An' he ain't come 
yet ! Dat good fo' nothin' villyan ! I'se goin' to 
scorn him all right. Jest yo' wait ! An' me all fixed 
up like de picture in de book! (Coming down cen- 
ter) Tse gwine to stand like she stands too. (Pos- 
ing down center) Oh, beautiful night ! 

(Enter Howard from left.) 

Howard. Ah! She is here! (He comes quickly 
and quietly down behind Cindy and throws his 
arms about her) I knew you'd come ! 

(Cindy screams and breaks away from him and 
then turns back fiercely.) 

Cindy. What yo' all mean? 

Howard. Great Scott ! 

Cindy. (Vehemently) Stand back, yo* villyan ! 
Don' yo' touch me ! I s-s-scorn yo', I do. Don' yo' 
talk to me ! 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 57 

Howard. (Backing up as Cindy approaches) I 
won't. I don't want to. 

Cindy. (Following him up) Yo' ain't got no 
more place in my 'fections dan a — frog! Don't yo' 
talk to me ! 

Howard. (Retreating) I don't want to. Be- 
lieve me — I — I — I 

Cindy. (Going after him fiercely) I won't be- 
lieve nothin' yo' say. Don' yo' come 'round here 
wid yo' stories! Yo' pestiferous villyan ! Now yo' 
git. Sho ! (She runs after him and chases him out 
tip right) Villyan! (Turning and coming down 
with great satisfaction) Well now, I s-s-scorned 
somebody! 

(Enter Amanda down right followed by Mar- 
garet. ) 

Amanda. Cindy, you out here ! 

Cindy. Yas'm, yas'm, Miss Mandy, but I'se 
agwine right up to de kitchen now and look after 
dem sandwiches. (Exit Cindy down right) 

Margaret. (Coming in) Auntie, just a minute. 
I must speak to you. 

Amanda. Speak out then. I hear folks com- 
ing. 

Margaret. (Going to her) Jim will be here 
to-night. 

Amanda. (Turning away) If he comes he will 
have more courage than most folks. 

Margaret. You don't still believe those foolish 
stories about him, do you? 

Amanda. (Going to left) There is nothing else 
to believe. Nobody but him knew where Enoch 
kept his money, so nobody but him could have 
taken it. 

Margaret. (Following her) Oh, please ! 

Amanda. Well, I don't see what else there is to 



58 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

be said about it. And if he comes here to-night I 
don't mean to ask him to stay. 

Margaret. Oh, how can you ! 

Amanda. (Coming back to center) That's just 
what I say — how can I when we have nobility in the 
party and me goin' to marry a 

Margaret. (Delighted) Marry! You going to 
be married ! 

Amanda. (In dismay) My land o' Goshen! 
What have I said ! 

Margaret. (Giving her a hug) Oh, Auntie, 
are you going to marry Mr. Westervelt? 

Amanda. (Shaking herself free) Sakes' alive ! 
How we talk ! I guess I've got marryin' on the 
brain. Now, Margaret, don't you think about what 
I said — at least not yet a while. Mercy on us ! I'm 
so upset I can't trust myself to talk any more. And 
here come the folks! (Enter Mrs. Berdan and 
Nancy followed by Hen and Enoch) Howd'y do! 
Good-evening ! Glad to see you. 

All. (Exchanging greetings) Good-evening! 
Howd'y do ! etc. 

Nancy. Are we the first ones? (She and Hen 
go to Margaret and talk) 

Mrs. Berdan. (Gazing about) My! How 
pretty you've got it fixed ! 

Enoch. (Going to Amanda) What sort of a 
party is this going to be, Amanda, a real folksy one, 
or will we all have to sit up for shapes? 

Amanda. (Stiffly) I hope you will remember 
that a lord and his folks are present. 

Enoch. (Walking sadly to left) I wish I could 
forget it! Ain't he ever goin' home? 

(Music is heard back in the garden.) 

Mrs. Berdan. (Going up and looking around) 
I wanter know ! Music playin' in the back yard ! 
Where have you got it hid ? 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 59 

Nancy. Let's go find it? (She goes up followed 
by Hen) 

(Enoch steps up to Margaret and they stand talk- 
ing earnestly. Susan and Kezia come in down 
right.) 

All. (Exchanging greetings) How'dy do! 
How are you? Etc. 

Kezie. (Crossing to left) Well, I come after 
all. Lawn parties ain't much in my line, but some- 
thing always happens when I stay away and I don't 
like to miss anything. 

Mrs. Berdan. 'Specially now. (Throwing up 
her hands) My lands ! how folks is talkin' ! Just 
since this afternoon what folks haven't said ! 

Kezia. (Coming back to center and looking off 
right) Here comes Liza hurryin' for all she's 
worth. 

Amanda. (Going nervously to left) I hope she 
hasn't found out ! 

Enoch. (Going to her) Found out what, 
Amanda ? 

Amanda. (Turning back) Nothing Enoch, 
nothin'. I'm all upset. I've had too many parties, 
I guess. 

(Hen and Nancy come back.) 

Margaret. (Looking off right) And here 
comes Howard behind Liza. He seems to be in a 
hurry too. 

(Enter Liza hurriedly down right) 

Liza. (Rushing in greatly excited) He's gone! 
All. Who? What! 

Liza. Cleared out, every hide and hair of him ! 
All. Who ? Mercy ! Lawsy me ! Etc. 



60 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. "1 

{Enter Howard down right.) 

Howard. {Hurriedly to Liza) If you will allow 
me 

Liza. {Shaking him off and going to center) 
Without a word to any one. Just picked up and 
walked off. Must have been some good reason for 
it, I say. Folks don't go slidin' off that way unless 
they've got somethin' to hide. 

Howard. {Going over to her) If you will allow 
me — — 

Liza. {Turning on him) Oh, you needn't talk. 
It don't look none too good for you, either. It's out 
of your house he went, and he's the second man. 
Now what do you suppose made him go? 

Amanda. {Going to her) Liza, hush. Who's 
gone? 

Howard. Let me tell you. It is my affair. 

Liza. It is Sir Clement. 

All. {Except Howard and Liza) Sir Clement ! 

Liza. Every hide and hair of him. Without 
sayin' a word to anyone. Must have been pretty 
much ashamed of himself not to say good-bye. 

Susan. {Hotly) Ashamed of himself! Sir 
Clement ashamed of himself. The idea of your 
saying a thing like that ! I should think that you 
would be ashamed of talking the way you do. No 
one can come into the town without your having 
something dreadful to say about them. And you 
tell a dozen different stories about the same person 
in the same breath. 

Enoch. {Laying his hand on her arm) Gently, 
gently. 

Susan. Well, it is true. She doesn't need even 
the shadow of a fact to start her off. {She goes up 
right) 

Howard. {Solemnly) Friends, I am very sorry 
to have to tell you that this time Miss Stuebbin is 
right. 



F THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 61 

(Susan. turns back.) 

All. (Except Liza, zvho is more astonished, 
hozvever, than any of the others) Right ! 

Howard. Yes, it grieves me very much, but Sir 
Clement was ashamed of himself. (He stands 
meekly at center) 

All. (Except Liza and Howard) Ashamed! 

Howard. And I am ashamed of myself too, be- 
cause— — 

All. You ! 

Howard. . I know that I should have given you 
some hint, some warning, but it was a hard thing 
to do and I wanted to give him another chance. 
You see, he had been doing things in England — 
things that made it seem — er — better for him to 
leave the country. But he appeared to be sorry and 
I gave him another chance, and the first day he 
came here — I have just found it out myself 

All. What ? 

Howard. He robbed Mr. Westervelt. 

(The following eight speeches come in quick suces- 
sion.) 

Mrs. Berdan. I wanter know ! 

Liza. Well, I never! 

Amanda. It can't be true ! 

Nancy. Sir Clement ! Why, he is a lord! 

Hen. Jumpin' ginger ! 

Margaret. Oh, I hope it isn't true! 

Enoch. Well, I snum ! 

Kezia. What next ! 

Amanda. (Dropping down on bench at left) 
I jest can't sense it all ! 

Susan. (Down right) I don't believe it. You 
can't make me believe it. 

Enoch. (Stepping to center) He couldn't have 



62 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

done it. He was here at the strawberry festival 
when it was taken. 

Howard. He was here when you. discovered that 
it was taken, but he took it on his way here, before 
I saw him. 

Susan. (Crossing to left) I don't believe it. 
You can't make me believe it. 

Liza. Nobody's goin' to try. We're just goin' 
to put the constable on his track, that's all. 

Howard. I hope you will not think that neces- 
sary, Mr. Westervelt. It would cause a great deal 
of unpleasant notoriety for us all, and I will gladly 
return the money. 

Liza. And let him go scott free ! 

Mrs. Berdan. I wanter know ! 

Amanda. (Holding her head) I feel like a 
beaten biscuit. 

Margaret. (To Enoch) I hope you will settle 
it that way. 

Enoch. (Shaking his head sadly) I don't care 
about the money. I guess I'll never have a chance 
to use it the way I wanted to. And besides, I don't 
see why Howard should pay for what his cousin 
does wrong. 

Howard. (Taking out his check-book) I feel 
responsible for him. He was not only my guest, 
but I knew something of his habits too. 

Enoch. But you say he did it before you saw 
him. 

Howard. (Handing check to Enoch) Please, 
Mr. Westervelt, let me do this. It is the easiest way 
to close this very unpleasant matter. 

(Enoch turns away shaking his head, so Susan 
takes the check from Howard just as Clem 
comes in from rear.) 

•Howard. (In a sudden panic) Clem! 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 63 

The others. Sir Clement! 

Clem. {Coining down) Please don't. 

Howard. {Putting on a brave front and stepping 
up to Clem ) How do you dare to come back here ! 

Clem. It did take some nerve, but I made up my 
mind to face the music. 

Howard. It was not necessary. I have explained 
and the best thing for you to do is to go as quickly 
as possible. {Trying to urge him off) Come. 
Every one is willing that you should go without 
further comment. 

Liza. {Going toward Clem) Oh, no! There 
is goin' to be plenty more said about it, and I'm 
goin' to begin by tellin' you right now that you are 
the first thief that has ever been in Reedville. 

Clem. Thief ! 

Susan. {Stepping to Clem's side) I know it 
is not true. 

Clem. It most certainly is not true. I have 
never stolen a thing in my life. 

Howard. {Anxiously) Come. The least said 
the better. You'll only make things worse for your- 
self. 

Clem. {Shaking Howard off) I have come 
here to say something and I am not going until it is 
said. You may go if you choose. I am going to tell 
everything and you will probably not enjoy it. 

Howard. Pray don't make a scene. 

Amanda. {Rising) Sir Clement 

Clem. {Down center) I am not Sir Clement. 
I have never been in England and I am not Howard 
Vanter's cousin. My name is Clement Wicks and I 
came out here to claim from Vanter what I con- 
sidered he owed me — a simple living. Between us, 
we decided that it would be a good joke to pass my- 
self off as his cousin, Sir Clement Blackwell. 
(Howard slips out unnoticed) That is what I came 
back to tell you. That is what I was trying to tell 



64 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

you this afternoon, Miss Armen. And, after what 
happened, I simply couldn't leave until you under- 
stood, so I have come 

Susan. (Interrupting) What about the money? 

Clem. Money? I don't know much about money. 
Haven't seen much for the past two years. 

Susan. But Mr. Westervelt's 

Enoch. Where were you when my money was 
taken ? 

Clem. As nearly as I can figure it out I must 
have been in Vanter's room getting into Sir Clem- 
ent's clothes. I came here in rags and he sent me to 
his rooms to dress in the best I could find. 

Mrs. Berdan. I wanter know ! 

(Enter Jim from rear.) 

Liza. I'd like to know how you're goin' to prove 
it. 

Jim. (Coming down) Clem Wicks! So it was 
you after all ! 

All. Jim ! 

(Amanda drops back on the bench again.) 

Kezia. (Taking a step toward him) Maybe 
you're goin' to help us straighten things out. 

Mrs. Berdan. We're in the greatest mixup! 

Nancy. Just one excitement after another ! 

Liza. (Going to Jim) If you didn't take Enoch's 
money, I wanter know who did. 

Jim. What is all this? I don't understand. 

Margaret. (Going to him) Oh, Jim, it has 
been dreadful ! 

Liza. (Nudging Jim impatiently) Enoch 
Westervelt was robbed the day you left and a man 
went into Howard Vanter's and nothing's been seen 
of him since and I wanter know all about it. 



THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 65 

Jim. Mr. Wicks went into Howards the day I 
left. I saw him as I ran for my train. 
Clem. He came out, Sir Clement. 

(Enter Rufus and Cindy from right.) 

Rufus. Marse Jim! I swan to gracious if it 
ain't ! 

Liza. I wanter know who took that money. 
(To Jim) If it wasn't you (To Clem) or you, who 
was it? Somebody went into Enoch's house while 
we was all here at the strawberry festival and I am 
goin' to find out who it was. 

Rufus. (Scratching his head) Jest lemme 
sozzle dat out. Ebberybody was yhere. 

Liza. No. (Pointing to Clem) He says he 
was at Howard's and Jim says he was running for 
his train. 

Rufus. An' Marse Howard? 

All. (Except Jim, Clem, and Rufus) Was 
here. 

Rufus. Yhere ? 

The others. Of course. 

Rufus. Den it must hab been one ob de ladies. 

The others. (Shocked) What do you mean? 

Rufus. Nobody but Marse Howard an' de ladies 
was wearin' white clothes dat day, an' when I went 
back fo' dat extra ,cake Miss Susan baked I seen 
somebody in white hidin' in de bushes close to 
Marse Westervelt's house. 

The others. And you never told ! 

Rufus. Well, dat Cindy do git so raspy at me I 
clean fo'got de minute she yelled to hurry up. 

Susan. (Handing Enoch the check) Get it 
cashed the first thing in the morning. (She goes 
back to Clem) 

Nancy. But it couldn't be Howard 1 
. Amanda. With all his manners ! 



66 THE ROMANCE HUNTERS. 

Kezia. And money. 

Hen. Where is he? 

All. (Looking about) Gone! 

Enoch. And so at last we are through with all 
the shams ! 

Amanda. (Jumping up) I am, anyway. 

Nancy. And I. 

Amanda. Titles and ornaments are all right in 
their way but we shouldn't forget the material 
they're fastened to. I see now what you mean, 
Enoch. (Going to him and holding out her hand) 
Any genuine thing is good. 

Enoch. (Clasping her hand) I knew you'd 
wake up. 

Margaret. (Anxiously going toward Amanda) 
Auntie 

Amanda. Yes, you can marry Jim if you want 
to, or anybody else as good. (Jim steps to Mar- 
garet's side) 

Nancy. (Slipping her hand through Hen's 
arm) And I guess I will be plain Mrs. Bush. 

Cindy. (Coming down right) Is de Cannibal 
Isles far from yhere ? 

The others. Oh, yes. 

Cindy. (Shaking her head decidedly) Well, I 
reckon I won't be dere queen nohow. Dere's too 
much oncertainess in high society, and I'se gwine 
to stick to housekeepin' and Rufus Green. 

(Rufus follows her down and she takes his hand.) 

Amanda. (At center with Enoch) And so our 

romance huntin' ends — like most good things 

All. At home. 

CURTAIN. 



